NaBloPoMo 12: Gobbledegook--it's what's for breakfast!

Apparently it's just not enough that I have two kids with special needs that require non-stop IEP meetings to discuss their RX of AS and determine whether the alphabet soup that is my children is brought to you by the letters ADD, OCD, and LMNOP.

No, now that I'm the helpless pawn of the fitness industry, I have a whole bunch of new Alpha-Bits to master.

Unfortunately, I haven't mastered them yet.

Last June I had a RMR Resting Metabolic Rate test. Today I had a second one. There is good news and bad. The good?

I've lost 18 pounds, or just under 10 percent of my body weight.

I've gotten better at burning fat. There are five fitness heart rate zones, and the further up the ladder you can get, the more efficiently you're burning fat. When I started, my best fat burning was happening at 108 beats a minute, which is no more than a moderate walking pace. Now it's occurring when I'm in Zone 2, when my heart rate is between 108 and 124 beats a minute. This means I have a higher degree of cardio fitness, and my body has become a better fat burning machine.

This is the bad news:

My Resting Metabolic Rate has plummeted from 1500 to 1038 calories a day.

I'm going to have to push myself and work out harder. Much harder. Like spending half an hour a day making sure my heart beats between 140 and 155 beats per minute. (Is it OK with everyone if I do this by watching scary movies?)

The kidding around is pretty much over. I really need to lift weights.

And the worst news is:

I don't really understand this stuff.

I glaze over like a doughnut when it's explained to me.