What's with all the wacky mascara brushes?

Has anyone else noticed that if you're shopping for a new mascara, it's likely to packaged in a very fat, Crayon-colored tube with a brush that looks like a specialty cleaning tool?

My favorite mascara is my (relatively) old school L'Oreal double ended. One end has that white stuff that makes your lashes look way thicker after you top the white stuff with the colored end. And this particular L'Oreal formula claims to make your lashes healthier. Well, guess what, internet? It's true. My lashes are actually longer and thicker.

The only problem is that my daughter somehow absconded with my tube. Which is highly unhygienic of her, so I told her so. She countered by reminding me that I haven't given her conjunctivitis, which is true. Then she offered to give me back the tube. But I don't want it back now. It is now hers to keep. I mean, she's my daughter, but honestly, I'd rather share her toothbrush. Which is saying a lot.

So anyway, in my search for a replacement, I've been digging through my stash of untrieds. Some were freebies from blogging events, some were travel sizes from GWPs, some arrived in Birchbox or Sample Society shipments.

And most of them were meh.

To start with the most offensive (because I actually paid retail for it) I present

 

 Dior Diorshow Extase Mascara in Plum

This was part of last summer's Nordstrom Anniversary Sale offerings. This collection was all about the purples, so the shade is Plum.

Now, mostly I eschew colored mascara. I'm constantly trying to stifle my inner teenaged girl ("Ooooh! Purple!") and not always succeeding. I realize that Women of a Certain Age can't get away with much in the way of outlandish makeup, but this was an extremely subtle shade of purple. I thought I'd try it to see whether it was softer than black, and flattering to my green eyes.

Well. Not only is it kind of meh in color, it neither lengthens nor thickens substantially. Also, the brush is shaped very strangely. See how it looks like a tiny black bottle brush? I'm sure this is supposed to do something fantastic, but all it did was apply the mascara unevenly.

Lancome Définicils

This is one of those tried-and-true, Allure and InStyle magazine Best-Of winners, so that was my next try. And it is a great mascara for those of us with not-very-long, not-very-thick wispy, insubstantial lashes. Applied lightly, it beefs those babies up and looks great.

Also, it comes in a long, elegant tube and has a normal brush. Both of which are to the good.

The problem lies in its half-life, which approaches plutonium. If I wear it on Monday and remove it Monday night, I wake up with black smudges when I wake up on Tuesday. And Wednesday. And even Thursday.

And so my search continued. Check back tomorrow for Poppy's attempts to replace her beloved L'Oreal Double Extend with another drugstore mascara.

*****

(I have to finish this tomorrow because I'm wiped. I had a fantastic workout today. I did weights and cardio with my trainer, then burned 550 calories on the elliptical. I even came home and took pictures of myself in my workout clothes so I could show you how badly I dress when I'm going to the gym. But now I'm exhausted. This getting up before 6:00 and exercising is wiping me out. It's like I got to my second childhood 20 years early!)

ZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz ...

30 Days to 10 years younger--10 minute tips. Tip 17: Be a brownie

You might be wondering why on earth Pamela Anderson is doing in a blog post aimed at beauty and style for women of a certain age. Well, duh, I'm using her as an example of what not to do. And I'm not going after her super-thin eyebrows and super-obvious implants. I'm going after her eyelashes.

Mascara has become like a Model T Ford--you can have any color you want, as long as it's black. Which is OK, as long as you think everyone looks best in black mascara. Unfortunately, I don't.

Black mascara is lovely at night, but for broad daylight, I find it a bit stark and artificial looking. If you're blonde, redhead, or like me, an aging brunette, you'll probably look better in a softer shade of brown/black or brown. In fact, if you're a redhead, you'll probably look best in auburn--if you can find it anywhere.

Unfortunately, most drugstore mascaras only come in black, super-plus-blackest-black, and black/brown. I checked L'Oreal, CoverGirl, Maybelline, and Revlon, and the story was almost always the same.

There are drugstore brands that offer brown mascara, but you have to dig pretty deep. Almay has at least one mascara available in brown.

For years, Max Factor was the only line with a mascara for redheads; unfortunately they're leaving the States. The mascara is still available at Drugstore.com, though. And Revlon's DoubleTwist line includes a shade called Blackened Ruby that looks auburn.

Fortunately, the latest fad in drugstore mascaras appears to be ones that emphasize the color of your eyes. Physician's Formula sells a brown mascara, and in addition, their intensive i-color mascara and intense i-color mascara with light interplay both claim to intensify eye-color. They're available in four shades. CoverGirl sells a similar line.

Department store lines offer a wider variety of mascara shades: Estee Lauder has several formulas that come in brown and and even navy blue; MAC has some browns, and so does Lancôme. (Lancôme also sells specialty mascaras, like gold and silver. But that's not the point of this post.)

Boutique brands like Jane Iredale, BeneFit, and Sephora offer mascaras in a variety of interesting shades. In fact, if you go to the Sephora website and do a search for "brown mascara," you'll discover that there are plenty of options.

The trick is to not go crazy. Colored mascara can be fun, but it's not something to wear if you want to be taken seriously. For proof, remember Princess Diana and her blue eyeliner and matching eyelashes. I'll confess to having developed a certain degree of fascination with colored mascaras, and I'm trying like crazy not to succumb to Yves St. Laurent Fascinating Violet or the Benefit BadGAL in Plum.

I remember the 80s and I don't think the world has yet recovered from my experiments with Princess Di-style cobalt blue.

Or my Two-Faced glitter lashes in the 90s when seriously? I was old enough to know better.

But while I busy myself locking up my credit cards and backing away from the Sephora website, I urge you to think about whether the black mascara you've been wearing for years and years is actually doing you any favors. Or could you, like the women pictured here, benefit from a softer look around the eyes?

Elsewhere:

The Beauty Blog has a great post on mascaras for redheads here.

Did you know that there is a beauty blog devoted to mascara? There is. It's called Clumps of Mascara. Currently on hiatus, but still packed with useful reviews. Click here.