How can you miss me if I don't go away?

Hey internet? Miss me?

OK, maybe not. But I feel guilty, so I'm here to confess.

I haven't been blogging much. I'm part of a group blog, and I've been managing to do my Mamarazzi posts. Most of the time, at least. If you've been wondering where the hell I've been, and why I haven't been blogging, here's the deal.

Right about when school started, I signed up with LiveStrong's MyPlate program. I figured out things like if I want to lose 1.5 pounds a week, I need to eat about 1300 calories a day. And if I want to drink a glass of wine, I need to walk for half an hour. So anyway, with the weekly weigh-ins and the long walks and the food journal, I've been busy. I've also lost 15 pounds.

(Don't get excited, I weigh 175 pounds and am wearing a size 14.)

I've also been decluttering my house. I highly recommend it as a complementary activity. First of all, it gives you something to do besides eat. Also, as you shrink, you get to get rid of your fat clothes, which is kind of fun. And third, you get a huge sense of accomplishment. Really. I've been decluttering a space a day. Sometimes it's something small, like the junk drawer in the kitchen; sometimes it's something appallingly out-of-control and death-trap-y, like my closet. And it feels fantastic! I could have filled you in on this, but I don't know how compelling it would be. I've been boring my husband for weeks now.

What the hell, I'll give it a try. Hey internet! You should see my broom closet!!! Pfft. See what I mean?

So anyway, dieting and decluttering have kept me away from my laptop.

But here's a big one. Did you know, going into this parenting gig, that teenagers were such time- and energy-sucks? Color me naive, but I thought that as long as truly excruciating bad behavior involving drugs, alcohol,  unwed motherhood, and fresh back-talk weren't part of the picture--well, how bad could it be?

HA.

I won't go into the awkward stage where teenagers have a ton of extra-curricular activities and no driver's license, because you're all acquainted with the second shift, i.e., the karate / Girl Scouts / choir rehearsal / music lessons runs. That's all very well and good. As long as the curricular activities are going well.

But after too many days where I went to a board meeting and got home at 2:30, only to have some huge hairy homework debacle occur an hour later, it finally dawned on me that I needed to shed as much volunteer or unpaid activity as I could. There have been too many days recently where I had to chose between my family getting a decent dinner, and a child's homework being completed.

And I am NOT a helicopter mom. But if they flunk out, they'll never get into college. And if they don't get into college, they won't graduate and come home and clutter up my empty nest with pizza boxes and video game equipment. And that would never do.

So I had to put aside some of my favorite activities, i.e., the ones where I make an idiot out of myself. For example, this Christmas, I won't be putting on my red sequin Santa hat and singing "Santa Baby" to a roomful of retirees at the local nursing home. Even though those old guys think I'm smoking hot.

Also, the blogging thing had to go for a while. I needed to husband my energy.

I would have told you, except I was in the middle of it, and sometimes when I'm in the middle of things, I lack insight. I even (gasp!) sometimes lack the words.

So anyway. Miss Doxie is back!!!! and so--much less thrillingly--am I.

(And unlike Miss Doxie, I'll try to come back more often than once a year.)