My Christmas list--so far.

In my ongoing project of spreading sweetness and light through the internet, I've decided to share my Christmas and/or Birthday list. I printed this list up and distributed to the members of the Buxom household. My birthday is December 12th, and it is never too early to get the word out about What I Want.


1). Shower gel. Philosophy always has nice ones. I haven't smelled this particular flavor, but if spiced clementines smell like oranges stuck with cloves, you'd have difficulty getting me out of the shower.

2)  A new shower cap. To go with the new shower gel. One must do one's best to preserve one's do.

3) Colonial Candles. The eight inch classic tapers. White or cream or this gorgeous shade of red.

You can get them online.

 3) A new gym bag. My canvas boat and tote bags aren’t big enough, and the open tops are awkward. The REI Balance gym bag is narrow enough to fit in a locker, and has dedicated places to stash gym shoes, car keys--even a yoga mat. It's $59.00.

Here it is in Jungle, zipped up and tidy.

And in use. Would I actually do yoga if I had a place to put a yoga mat?

Who knows. But I might actually remember to pack a water bottle.

4) Big cream colored pillar candles for my TV-watching pleasure. I like the ones from that store on Elm Street … across from the park, a little west of the town parking lot? But if you're getting the tapers on line, you could get these from Colonial Candle.

 5) Flowers—red roses, poinsettias, Christmas-y arrangements—it’s all good!

6) Shearling-lined slippers with rubber soles. L. L. Bean Wicked Good moccasins are the classic. In the past, I've always gotten brown, but that was in the old days, when you could get Wicked Good slippers in any shade you wanted, as long as it was brown.

Now they come in a rainbow of shades! OK, six.

So how about a fashion-forward chocolate brown?

(And for anyone who objects that this blog is supposed to be about beauty, allow me to assure you that I am far more beautiful when my feet are cozy.)


7) Wool socks. Cable knit knee socks are available at Vermont Country Store.

Fancy ones can be had at Gorsuch.

See above remarks about cozy feet.

8) Clé de Peau Beauté Palette de Voyage for Holiday 2012. I've heard great things about their products but have only popped for a foundation. This palette has an eye quad, a sample-sized mascara, lipstick, cheek color, and eyebrow and eyeliner color. It's available at Neiman Marcus and costs a dazzling $180. But it's so cute!

9) From Hermes.com: L'Ivresse de l'Infini Silk twilly. It costs $140, which is a ridiculous price for a scrap of silk. But look at the colors!

10) If we're really reaching, Hermes “New Libris” Cashmere and silk stole with jacquard weave in comes in violet and costs a mind-boggling $860.00. But it's a jacquard weave, people. 

Talk about a pop of color!

10) Caviar. Beluga or Sevruga.

Or a jar of that La Prairie caviar eye cream her friend Audrey swears by--it's just as expensive. And Audrey's skin looks amazing, so there's that.

Also? Less fattening.

Overcoming Inertia, Part II: Practice

This post is a follow-up to yesterday's, where, in a rather long-winded fashion (as is my wont) I eventually made a point (I hope). Which is this: you know you're serious about an activity when you feel the need to pull together a working wardrobe for it. And over the course of about six months where I spent four to six hours at the gym, this is what happened to me.

Eventually I replaced my washed-out Smith College and Boston Red Sox t-shirts with plain shirts that don't plaster lettering all over The Balcony. My long sweatpants, baggy capris, and (I kid you not) velour track suits have also disappeared. The brown, navy, black shades have been replaced with black, gray, and white.

These are the things I like. Except for shoes, I have at least three of everything on this list, so there is always something clean to wear.

1. Shock Absorber Maximum Control Wire Free Sports Bra

Whether I'm doing a Jillian Michael's DVD or working with my trainer, it's wise to dress like a runner who is planning on running a marathon during an earthquake. 

These bras provide Level 4 compression/lack of bounce.

It looks a little odd, but I think the double two-hook closure makes a difference. This baby is jumping jacks-ready! It's available at Her Room and Bare Necessities for $69. (Her Room has some bright colored ones on sale for $49, and Bare Necessities is currently offering 15 percent off.)

Gap Essential Scoop Neck T-Shirt

These t-shirts are a little more low-cut than I'd usually wear to the gym, but no one is looking at my cleavage, and it does help me stay cool.

The cotton is a nice, thick weight, and the fit is loose without being baggy. I previously mentioned buying seven of these using Gap Rewards gift cards. I'm thrilled to have a nice stack of new t-shirts. This shirt only comes in black, white, and gray (for the fashion-forward.) $14.50.

Victoria's Secret Supermodel Capris

Yes, Victoria's Secret. And don't think I don't feel a little silly shopping there.

These capris come with a variety of colored waistbands. Not surprisingly, I opt for the black-on-black style. I wear them higher than the model; they fit right under my navel and end higher on the leg. The fit in the leg is perfect; not skin tight, but not baggy. There is a slight flare at the bottom which looks cute and probably allows some extra ventilation. They wash and dry well, and unlike the ones I got from Athletica, they don't end up a snarling, static-y mess when I pull them out of the dryer. These are available for $59.50.

Puma footies

I got so tired of various minor variations in the style and weight of my sports socks. I kept not noticing the differences when I paired them when I was folding laundry, and ending up heading out wearing mismatched socks.

I chucked them all and replaced them with two six packs of footies.

Cross Trainers

I have  two pairs, and I alternate them. They say you should alternate dress shoes every day, and I figured it can't hurt to alternate sports shoes. The Reeboks are slightly wider through the arch, but the Nikes fit better in the heel.

That's it!

I work out indoors in a gym, so I pretty much wear the same thing year round. I add a sweatshirt in really cold weather, but I drive to the gym, so I don't really need to worry about dressing for the weather.

I'm in the market for a really good gym bag, though, so if anyone has any suggestions, comment away!

Overcoming Inertia, Part I: Theory

When I was in graduate school, a professor of mine ran a short seminar every quarter. He called it "How to write a paper for Mr. Veeder." All of his students attended--undergrads and grad students alike--and it was the finest--and shortest presentation on how to write well that I've ever heard.

One of these days, when I'm tired of talking about lipstick, I'll get around to sharing some of Mr Veeder's insights. For now, though, I'm just going to talk about one of them.

According to Veeder, when you write, your goal should be to overcome reader inertia. You want to keep the reader turning pages. When he reaches the bottom of page 3, you want his first instinct to be to proceed to page 4, not to get up and see what's on TV, or (my personal favorite) to check to see whether the mail has been delivered.

When it comes to inertia, a professor faced with a stack of student papers to read has nothing on the average, out-of-shape American. We who are out of shape have developed many reasons to avoid working out. We're too busy. We're embarrassed. We don't have the time. We don't know Pilates from Zumba because we haven't worked out regularly since Jane Fonda was churning out aerobics tapes.

Let me steal a concept from another man whose oeuvre I admire. If David Letterman were to come up with a "Top 10 Reasons to Not Work Out," I might be OK with "I can't fit it into my day." Or "The wall of flat screens running CNN is distracting and annoying."

On the other hand, I wouldn't want "I don't have anything to wear" to appear on the list.

After a few months of going to the gym pretty steadily, I was tired of grabbing one of my collection of faded Red Sox t-shirts and stretched out, mismatched shorts. I realized that I didn't just need to buy new gym clothes, I wanted to. I liked the idea of having a lot of well-fitting, comfortable, coordinated, attractive, and functional gym clothes clean, folded, and ready to throw on and head to the gym.

At some point, new work out clothes stopped being a silly extravagance and started being a sensible use of my money. Working out wasn't some passing phase. I was spending about 10 hours a week at the gym, and I'd been doing it for six months. I was becoming an athlete. And it was time I started dressing like one.

Henry David Thoreau once said "Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes." Well, Henry David Thoreau can kiss my spandex-covered ass.

Shiny!

Fitness isn't pretty.

Once more, I waited to start blogging until I was completely brain dead.

So I'll leave you with this picture of me, taken just after today's attempt at Level 2 of Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred. Bright sunlight (see the shadow of my iPhone?) and no makeup. And as Mal says on Firefly, "Shiny!"

You know what? I figured out what the Mona Lisa's smile means. Someone told her "Horses sweat; men perspire; ladies glow."

And she thought, "O RLY?"

Because that?

Was a pretty intense 20 minutes, my friends.

Gym bags for the beauty obsessed

I suppose I could start a month-long series of blog posts devoted to diet and fitness with my stats--how much weight I've lost, how much more I intend to lose--that sort of thing. But I think I should play to my strengths and blog about what I know.

I run into a lot of "what's in my handbag" posts, but I don't read a lot of (read: any) diet/fitness blogs, so I don't know whether people talk about what they keep packed in their gym bags.

But over the past five months, I've kept a bag packed in the car because I've reached the point where I am hit by spontaneous urges to go work out. Yes, really. You never know when the urge to work out will strike! So here's what's in my gym bag--I mean, in addition to workout clothes and clean underwear and flip-flops and such.

Skincare

Even though my skin is, in general drier than it used to be, probably because I am, in general, older than I used to be--working out all the time has a mitigating effect. All that cardio definitely adds a glow, and my skin feels softer and more comfortable. This wouldn't be the case if I were spending two hours a day in a chlorine pool, but since I'm usually working with a trainer or on the elliptical, it's almost as if I'm hitting the steam bath on a regular basis.

Actually, come to think of it, I'm pretty much a walking steam bath. (Yuck!)

Anyway, I've learned that in the morning when I head to the gym, I should be absolutely bare-faced. I really dislike the sensation of sweating off a face full of makeup. I don't even wear moisturizer, since my moisturizer has sunscreen, and when I sweat the sunscreen runs into my eyes and stings. So I do my workout and then go clean up. And finally get around to using some products. But not many!

I always have a package of Oil of Olay wipes

because they're spill-proof, non-irritating, and refreshing.

I carry some Garnier Nutritioniste eye cream

because the eye area is the only part of my face that feels truly dry these days.

And right now, instead of a lot of different skin treatments, I'm just using beauty balm

to see whether it can take the place of moisturizer, sunscreen, and base. So far so good!

Body

I definitely need to put on lotion after a shower, so I've been relying heavily on scented body lotions. They're easier than carrying fragrance and lotion, and they don't break. Right now I'm enjoying Chanel #19.

Hair

Ack, hair. OK, I hate the hair dryers at my gym because they don't have nozzles to concentrate the air flow, and when I use them, my hair ends up a frizzy mess. That means if I really want to look good, I have to pack my own blow dryer. And a brush. And a heat-styling product. And maybe a flat-iron. Which adds up to a second gym bag just for my hair.

So what I really do is check to see how well my hair has survived my workout. If I think I can get away with it, I use a shower cap and skip the shampoo / blowout. Of course, I make sure I have some covered elastic bands. And some Klorane dry shampoo. I mean, I'm not totally without standards.

I can see your eyes rolling from here. Great. The internet thinks I'm gross. FINE.

Makeup

I always pack a stash of makeup in my gym bag, because when I get rushed, I am wont to do things like pack a full-on ladies-who-lunch outfit--and then forget to bring my makeup.

When I'm getting dressed at home, I'll amuse myself by coordinating my makeup to my outfit--say, gray and plum eye shadows when I'm wearing purple. But for the gym, I need to carry a bag of basic makeup that is guaranteed to look good with anything I'm wearing. It should also be non-breakable, leak-proof, and cheap, since it's going to be spending a lot of time in the car.

In addition to my beauty balm, I tend to carry a cream blush in a goes-with-everything shade of pale rose pink.

 Revlon Colorburst Lip Butter in Pink Truffle

Mascara and eyelash curler

Concealer

And an eye quad for when I really feel like putting on the dog.

The 12 Days of Blogmas: Day Twelve--the OMG I've actually rejoined Weight Watchers edition

Hey, everybody! I'm fat again.

And with a BlissDom in February, a college reunion in May, and BlogHer in July, I need to get ready to deal with my public. And that means joining the gym and starting the diet.

The thing is, I'm re-joining a gym I used to go to about 10 years ago. And Weight Watchers? Wasn't it just two years ago I lost almost 20 pounds doing that?

I'm like the new Alfred E. Neuman: What me, yo-yo? God, I'm such a cliché. I feel so sheepish. Sheepish and hungry.

I'm a cliché who's lightheaded from hunger, so I'd better get on with the contest before I faint dead away.

Because it's the final day of the contest. The first person to figure out what popular Christmas song is illustrated with the following record album covers wins a Mamarazzi t-shirt.

I just hope the sound of my stomach rumbling doesn't prevent you from concentrating, that's all.

Pajama blogging at its finest

I'm not really here. OK, I am. But I'm not presentable. Because I'm going to the gym.

OK, yes, it's after 11:00 in the morning and I'm still not dressed, but you know, I've had such a busy week. I forced myself to do all kinds of things I didn't want to do--like get dressed up, drive downtown, attend meetings, go to fundraising events and concerts--when all I wanted to do was play with the internet.

I mean, why put yourself in situations where you have to get dressed in uncomfortable clothes and be polite, when you could stay in your pajamas and take cheap shots at celebrities?

So just a few quick, sweet, fruity Jell-O cheap shots, and then I'll promise I'll go all low-fat organic strawberry smoothie at the gym.

Today's winner is Anne Heche, my current Mamarazzi target for pretending not to be batshit crazy, when we all know she is.



Runner-up Number 1 was Miss Personality herself, Lindsay Lohan



who apparently Comes In Color. Her so-called dress looks like an ace bandage on acid. "She's like a rainbow. Coming colors in the air. Oh everywhere." Including her hair. Which frankly, looks better red, because when Lindsay goes blonde she looks like every other peroxide blonde coke-snorting starlet who just escaped from rehab. Such as this one:


who has not yet discovered that low-rise jeans are out of style. Or that wearing a hat doesn't make a wig look less like a wig. Or that it's called underwear for a reason.

OK, folks--gym time.